You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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