After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Can I color on your dick again?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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