I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
