Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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