I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize