Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.