He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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