remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
