Whod you bang
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
