Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
