I think I am morally bankrupt
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
