I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
