i think i have herpe
just one?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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