Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Randomize
