it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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