Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
