i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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