My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
