dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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