Have you finally orgasmed yet?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
The cops high fived after they tackled you
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
