What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
