sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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