Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
We left an ass print on the piano.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
His nipple licking is glorious
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