is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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