How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
This is my gift to your gina
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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