We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
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He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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