Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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