he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
