Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
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