Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Randomize
