That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
