I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
