I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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