Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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