I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize