so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize