How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
