sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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