your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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