he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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