and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize