I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
this just has baby written all over it
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
