were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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