Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My feet surprised me
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize