oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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