And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a dick in a sweater?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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