youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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