garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
