We're facebook friends in real life
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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