they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
